Saturday, January 2, 2016
I WAS SENT TO JAIL FOR 5 DAYS 4 THIS BLOG I CREATED TO SHOW THE WORLD WE LIVE IN~!!!!
I wanted to share with the world now that BOTH my girls cases are closed my oldest now 18 was closed in April 2015 and lies were made up about my now 16 yr. old to run it out longer it closed May 19th 2015 but it totally screwed her out of summer services because we moved to Washington state. This was before I left San Diego, I was sent to jail wasn't in vain though as I was scared first when I went in as there were druggies, bank robber, double offenders for DUI some people that had done some serious crimes. I started telling my story and what kind of disability I had etc.... only because I wanted to communicate and try and help some and I did before you knew it I was the hottest chick in lock down because I was telling the druggies that they didn't need drugs as a way out all they needed was Jesus Christ there were 31 in my room with bunk-beds and 42 on the opposite side you could go over to if you wanted as the bathroom was our divider. Well a few took a liking to me but others became jealous because the attention was on me. God filled me with such power that I prayed for at night that two black ladies were tough and they didn't care for me so I kept my distance but others would come ask "Hey miss Linda, can I pray with you."as they noticed me reading the bible, so I did and it was awesome so many of them had ditched there kids for the dope, some were living with family but most CPS came and took. Now those are serious situation the kids need better care but in my book CPS is NEVER the answer because children are just re-abused & used all over sometimes worse as was my youngest Shellbe. We were forced out of bed at 6 a.m. for breakfast and to walk in a civil line to what was called the chow house. The food was sickening never did I eat nothing except fruit. I was told so much how they make wine to how they slip in drugs but my focus was always my girls but God had a plan to use me for his glory. I had my bible on my bed reading it before light's out at 10 p.m. and some girls would sit at the end of the bed and ask me who is this God you believe in and cares so much about you and then they would share there horror stories of how they started their lifestyle weather it was stealing, stripping, or giving up there beautiful kids just for the next fix. I was sad being I wanted my girls back so bad and had NEVER choose nothing over them. I just was AUTISTIC with some clinical depression and because I was raising TWO autistic girls and overwhelmed I broke down saying I didn't want to live to this provider who was working with my youngest so showing her my arm I cut on but my girls NEVER saw it or knew I was doing it I just needed to feel but she chose to call police and CPS was called and I begged them to call my family as I went into a psychiatric hospital for 3 day's then let go told your not a danger to yourself or anyone else your free to go. Then the fight was set in motion as I was asked by a CPS supervisor "So you think your gonna get your kids back." I said "Yes of course." She replied very nasty "Well see about that." getting back to jail the day's were long most girls would sleep all day, they did play Madea goes to jail which was funny. I was approached by this black girl earlier I was intimidated by she came up and said "Hey I like to write poems want to hear some I said sure she told me in one poem about her "husband" her husband was her choice of drug heroin and how she gave up her children for it so her mamma had to raise her kids, she said the last time she visited them her 8 year old begged her to stay and give up her #1 love heroin as she cried I did to and I prayed with her and told her what a wonderful poet she was and someday her stuff could get published. This hard, beaten down heart was still ALIVE inside her. She thanked me and even hugged me as I told her if she was to seek Jesus he could clear her mind from that drug and go back to her kids. Then on my final night there word got around I was to be released the next morning so this black grandma that despised me and even made fun of my disability and I looked at her when she did and said but Jesus still loves you. She came into the bathroom while I was brushing my teeth and laid herself on the counter sobbing like a baby and said "Mam I go to court tomorrow will you pray for me." and I said "Praise Jesus, sure I will." later that night I couldn't sleep and I wrote all the girls a long letter about accepting Jesus as their personal savior could save thier souls and release there demonds that had a hold upon them and it was my time to go but keep the faith. So I taped it on the bathroom mirror with bible versus and told them there life had a purpose. As 4 a.m. came it was time to leave jail and change into my regular clothes I felt sooooo much power it was like Daniel must of felt walking out of the Lyon's den. See God uses ALL situations for his good & glory and I prayed I made a difference in just (1) as that's called saving a life of guilt and shame and giving them hope for their future. Most of these women were so lost and broken but I know God had a purpose to use ME for there good. I knew I didn't belong there but God did because I was offered community service FIRST but denied it and said I am ready for jail because I prayed the night before and the Lord weighed heavy upon my heart that was what I was to do. My attorney's mouth hit the floor and said "Linda are you sure this is what you want to do." "I said yes God told me to do it. When you have faith as little as a mustard seed and "believe" anything is possible~!!
NEVER EVER GIVE UP~!!! JESUS IS THERE.