A letter to GOD

Hello God,
Just checking in to tell you I prayed with my neighbor Ava's family like you asked of me and it felt good despite not even knowing them~! She checked out of this world this past mother's day weekend, theirs laughter coming from her apartment as they move things, I sure hope it's all because they know you. It's been a struggle because you know who has been trying to get me to feel depressed but I am not because if you can do for me what you've done and given me a better heart & soul deeper in love with you, then anything is possible. This fiery trial is only temporary and even if it goes by in years they go so fast cause I know your coming. I was blessed to be a mom as long as I was given and very thankful for that. My girls love me & you love them so much more I know!
I instilled good morals & important values & directed them to you, so now it's time for them to follow you by what they have learned from me & this brings me comfort. As the most important role I could of been given here on earth, being a mother was a very precious gift & even though my girls are not grown or with me @ this time it is your will they will blossom & grow in you I pray. I am blessed to be called by you, Lord & be one of your many warriors! Lot's of bad thing's happen to good people and I never understood until now. You use us for the ones who do not know what a wonderful, awesome God you are, we are teacher's without a degree but guided by the every best loving hand of a father I am so glad to know. If it weren't for your grace I could not be who I have become today~!! God it is my prayer, you'll not only look after and care for my girls but each and every child you gave as a gift from above. Forgive me God if there were times in my rush in life I did not pause to say thank you for all I have been given & even taken away. I am so happy for the unbelievable strength you have given for me to go on, and learn from my mistakes & never give the devil a hold but instead make him a footstool for my feet. I am who I am only because of your loving grace & all the times you carried me through the battlefield. Thank you God for choosing me & even in giving up something so dear to my heart, I have learned it's not what we love but how we love! Let my light shine for you God to glorify you & give wisdom to those that "no not what they do" and offer my teaching to all who want to listen & learn it's not about our trial but how we choose to walk through it and not to fear what is to come very soon. Thankful for the masterpiece you created in me.


                   Love to you, your precious child Linda


"You are a letter....written not with a pen and ink but with the spirit of the living God."    2 Corinthians 3:3  Niv

Faces of Victims of Family Court and Child Protective Services (3)

**Montanna's note to God**

WHY IS NOBODY LISTENING ? PLEASE HELP ME IF YOU CAN~!!

Please is anybody out their in this world that is willing & able to help me, like a ADA law attorney ? I am so frustrated as nobody seems to want to move in my direction. I am praying and I am trusting in God he will put together the right people but I feel so alone. Two years I have lost my girls and for what not because I use or abuse drugs & not because I am a lush and misuse alcohol & not because I have abused or left my girls unattended but you know what for simply because I have Aspergers and the department (Believes I have a issue with communicating with children I raised and understand more because I live with autism as well plus they just got it in for me because their not willing to be educated on autism~!! ) I have done NOTHING and I WAS A EXCELLENT MOM raising my girls in church, teaching them morals and good thing's to live by, setting a example in front of them the way a decent person should be~!! Why oh Lord, should I be singled out and picked on so harshly ? I have not seen my girls in 6 month's, did you all hear 6 month's I have been intentionally kept from my children~!!  This is parental alienating them from me so much my youngest asked my oldest daughter Amber 26 "Did momma die" now isn't that the way our system should be ? Yes I have a adult daughter 26 yrs. old I raised Alone. I am just beside myself in how they "get away with it all" you know why, because NOBODY has the gut's to stand up to them this is why~!! To anyone but especially to someone with "special needs" as myself & my girls just ripping us apart like they have has surely caused mental anguish within. The torment I have lived it's a nightmare I surely could have never made up, like a trip to Sea world my oldest flew out from Seattle and we had a hearing and the social workers had decided that my oldest could take the girls but I could not go, but then in fear of Amber letting me see the girls they put a older lady in charge to go with her just to make sure, my youngest was so excited about Sea world she came to me and said "Momma we get to go to Sea world but I'm sorry you can't come" now if this isn't cruel, oh but that's just the start of thing's. I begged to see my girls for Christmas, birthday's, any holidays but never in 2 yrs. did one such a visit take place. Then there was this visit I was en-route to and I had already stopped @ Wendy's and picked up food for them but was called driving on the way to the visit and told there is going to be "no visit today" when I questioned why he said "Just because" and hung up so I drove back home sobbing but they expect me to call 24 hrs. in advance if I was to not come to a visit. Then now 6 mos. without seeing them and this isn't the first time I was kept 3 mos. once before so a total of 9 month's in 2 years almost half of the time and again I am no mass murderer, nor did I ever hurt my girls, no alcohol or drug problems. ALL BECAUSE I AM MILDLY AUTISTIC & THEY JUST DON'T LIKE ME PLAIN & SIMPLE~!! THEY HAVE NOTHING ELSE ??   
I went into the hospital for 3 day's for some mild depression, kicked out with no case plan and 2 yrs. later my children are still gone talk about a cruel & evil world. They knew I had a awesome relationship with my girls so they took and abused what mattered most my dignity as a parent, my relationship that meant so much to us all and separated all 3 of us in 3 different directions, yes neither child has ever been placed together and "if" they get a visit they pick the younger one up to sit on a bench & watch the older one play a basketball game now that's a fair & healthy visit for the siblings. I became homeless & was forced to live in my car for 5 months due to them who cared nothing for me or my children because with our broken state of California my kids bring in funds, funds for them to keep their job's~!! My own attorney even stated "They will reinstate your visit's because it's federal funding." Yes sadly like the bible say's money is the root of all evil .  So very, very sad human lives are used in this way and all the while my poor innocent children have been "victims" of the system, being abused in so many way's that they will emotionally carry the scars for good as the two same loving, caring & sheltered girls will come back very different~!! They have been even kept from family as my parent's and my oldest daughter have both tried countless times to get them. My parent's house was checked not once but twice and then my father was made to have fingerprints done twice because he has rheumatoid arthritis so is so bad his hands are crippled badly & it was very painful & even after that they claimed my parent's didn't fill out proper papers & dropped it. Then even though my oldest lived with me her entire life until 24 with her sister's they claim she can't handle their "special needs" even though she was so good with her sister's all their born lives, just another excuse because they want to make sure I never see or touch my girls again, HORRIFIC I say & this is the truth~!!   So all I can do is pray to my Holy merciful, loving, caring God and hope it is his will to reunite my family someday soon and as he promises to bring something out of evil for his good. 
One last thing "What better way to control a mother than to take full control of her children" this is the mind thinking of social services in my case for sure~!!

                                                

GOD OF WONDERS

* How do you ACT in a impossible situation ? *

How is it you usually act in the most impossible situation ?  

1. Do not grow bitter @ God.
2. Focus on what you do have & not what you don't have.
3. Step out on the bare word of God.
4. Use what you have been given.
5. Appreciate your first breath when you wake up.
6. Give of yourself to others.
7. Thank him for every meal.
8. Learn to use your patience in this time.
9. Spend time devoted to God.
10. Work hard on your "re-actions" to be stronger for the next situation you will encounter in this life.

Always remember :

And we know that all things work together for the good to them that love God, to them who are called according to his purpose.
Romans 8-28


I myself have walked through many tribulations but walking through the fire during this two year loss of my autistic girls to foster care all because of a 3-day stay in the hospital for depression then being diagnosed myself with Aspergers @ 46 & thinking it was social services that was being so wicked with me in keeping my children away from me but reading a book called "Trusting God" has opened my eyes in learning to understand this was God's plan all along to draw me closer to him & I have as I have grown so much in loving Jesus & giving up myself in the flesh in order to find my soul & it's been a awesome journey and I know God is working on me hard to prepare me for his kingdom. You to can be blessed in all areas of a impossible situation if you believe in the most powerful, loving, giving & gentle heavenly father because he is their & wants you to follow & believe in what he can do for you. I pray my story can & will inspire you to accept what Jesus wants from you in ALL situations. God Bless You~!!

                                                

)))) MY SISTER'S KEEPER ((((

 My sister was born premature weighing @ only 4 lbs. despite being so small mom said she was a fighter. When she came home I knew I was going to love her none the less. She grew slow & I was always dragging her around in something mostly my baby's buggy as she fit just like the dolls did. I helped mommy change her,feed her & even rock her to sleep. She had many problem's as their were many visit's to the hospital & doctor's office through it all we were the best of buddies. I sang to her when she was scared & told her stories about Jesus to comfort her @ night. We both actually had feeding issues @ 6 month's I was even in the hospital with a feeding tube up my nose but mom later found out we had a wheat & gluten allergy and issues with milk to. I love my sister & I helped tie her shoes so we wouldn't be late for the bus, I even fixed her breakfast some times so momma could sleep a little longer cause my sister didn't always sleep well at night. I remember one time when we took a bath together I washed her hair & made it look like a mo-hawk with the shampoo. I played many games with her & even hid so hard during hide 'n' seek I'd finally give myself up it was to hot in that closet. We have grown so close as we are only 19 months apart anyways. Being she went to the doctor a lot she like to play that but with me getting all the shot's & stuff down my throat but I let her knowing that's what good sister's do. I even showed her how to draw her own name when she became frustrated & couldn't do it alone. We shared many,many good times together even when she was diagnosed with autism @ 7 yrs. old I told her don't be sad, your still very smart & are better @ the monkey bars then me & later when I was diagnosed with Aspergers @ 11 she said now we really have a bond & your way more talented at drawing then me so we each have something to be very proud of in ourselves. Our bond is strong and will be united together forever & always because we are sister's. I love you my little sis~!!!   M.S.