Court Date 9-24-10

Well today went exceptionally well I believe as the girls didn't come home but I was ordered to get much more services for my family to bring us together so praise God for this. It was aparent the judge was very impressed with both girls and how they have grown and he mentioned to me this doesn't represent just because there out of my care. So as of now were still being "supervised" and I was told the judge ordered that the county must observe the difference between my next few visit's and increase my time for sure~!! I am excited the children's attorney as mine is very confused on why I am under such restriction and agree's it need's to be lifted so in a month thing's should change. The judge also ordered more time between the siblings to have vists all day at least twice a month. Then he ordered the county to find a therapit's for us all who understand's autism to do family therapy. He did say he believed I get very frustrated not understanding the system or dealing with him giving discreation to the county. So he assured me he was watching this case very close and was going to set trials every month to evaluate the difference in the visit's. The girls attorney stated # 13 and # 11 both have stated many,many times they want to go home and she agree'd with my attorney that they need to be with their mother. So my attorney claims things are getting better and closer to the return of my girls. I guess God's not finished working on me yet. He also stated as the county keep sayin we want all her pages off the internet he agreed I wasn't being vicious about my post and said you just can't post the girls pictures or names to I am now referring to them as #13 & #11 so you will know who they are. So thank for all the prayers and concern for my family. It will get better because  God is in control. So thank you Jesus~!!

My visit 9-21-10

What a awesome visit I had with my two beautiful daughter's. I am a very proud momma of my girls and their ability to cope in a situation they never asked to be in. We played uno and another rock game Montanna loves and laughed and really enjoyed each other's company. I made a special desert made with strawberry cream cheese, strawberry jam, cut up apple bit's and topped with vanilla almond granola and served on ritz brown suger cracker's they absolutely loved it as I did and I don't like cream cheese but it was good~!! I alway's make special things for my precious girls that's just the type of momma I am. Even both the supervisors noted what a wonderful visit it was. I am showing love from my heart as jesus is transforming me to "love" in a better aspect of even people I don't really like all that much but his heart radiated love as I want to do. My life is better as I have started medication, I have a part-time job bathing dog's and I certainly worked hard on getting into my own place so the girls would have a home to come to. My neighbor hood is a nice one and I am preparing to give cookies to all my new neighbors to share in what christ has asked of us to "love thy neighbor as ourselves" and I am happy. I have no more ill feeling's of depression or anger and I am living my life to the fullest. I am attending court in the mourning and leaving it in God's hands as he know's if it's time or not. I have come a long way and Jesus knows my heart and he is all that really matter's to me on what he think's and see's as my growth in him. Just pray~and know he is in total control~!! Thanks for reading and stay in touch as I can only post on facebook for you to see my blog as it was set to private to please them as is my facebook so no social workers can view and my attorney said this is fine. God bless all of you.

                                                      

~Today's visit~9-7-10

                                                                   

Today was just awesome as I had a wonderful time with my precious girls. Montanna had come home from school for being sick so they weren't sure if she was going to show but do you think she'd miss her momma over a tummy ache, I think not~: )  I am ever so important in my girls lives no matter the time and distance put between us. I prayed very hard for my heart to spew nothing but love and it did, as God is alway's faithful to my prayers. Shellbe was ms. talkative because she missed me last week but loved her chocolate milk momma put on ice for her and their chocolate chip cookies as I never go without a ice chest with drinks and a bag of snacks as I have alway's been a thoughtful momma to my girls. Just to see their beautiful smiles made my heart melt like butter. Montanna is so smart, she's bored in science cause their not doing anything "deep enough" for her brain. There growing up and at least I am allowed to watch my girls grow and I thank the good Lord for that. I took Shellbe's pictures this week to her of her family, and Ronald McDonald and last was her and Tanna together. I told her to put them by her bed when she say's her prayers she can see her family. She said "Momma your alway's in my heart" so my baby has her angels around her taking care of her so it makes me feel better as she also said "God has angels looking out for me" and every picture I have done of Shellbe has orbs on her so their is I know at least the one that Shellbe told me when she was 3 and was taken into foster care after her father abused her and I went into the hospital with a nervous breakdown after I found out their was evidence found on her. At the foster home Shellbe was locked in a room and not allowed outside of it and one day on a visit she told me about "Darla" how she was very bright, and very beautiful with lots of colors and she explained how she visits her and keeps her company,she's my friend she said. I know God had a "Special" angel then as he does now because of Shellbe's autism and trusting people as she does. I know Shellbe has seen something beyond what we will ever see here on earth. God takes care of his children. I am so thankful for this tribulation to work for the good in my life to trasform my heart to be full of love and obidence for my father. I have learned so much and give thanks everyday for all of what God gives and even takes away because I am closer to that enchanted kingdom I will forever be with my precious girls for sure. Thank's to all for reading my blog and if you give your heart to Jesus you can overcome any tribulation you encounter and it only makes you wiser and stronger for him.
May God richly bless each one of you like he has me.