STAND UP FOR WHAT'S RIGHT, EVEN IF STANDING ALONE~!!

                                                              
June 11, 2012  Court Hearing

Seriously do they think I am going to stop posting ALL ILLEGAL things this courthouse does and tries to keep secret. I am a woman of courage, justice & a warrior for my savior Jesus Christ & he said if they persecute me they will persecute you as well and it's being done~!!! If I never parent my girls again while under 18 then that is solely the Lords decision NOT theirs as they may think~!! 
Commissioner Michael Imhoff is a very lost soul & I pray for him daily as he once sat outside reading his paper & smoking his cigarettes & I went out & told him my children mean just as much to me as his cigarettes do to him and sadly he shows NO RE-GUARD for families & keeping them together~!! He is the most selfish man who once was a father & had children that looked up to him I am sure but he shows NO AUTHORITY over his courtroom~!! You become a attorney BEFORE you can be a commissioner so he clearly knows the law & knows it's being broken~!! I wonder truly why you would want to wear the robe but not have the ability to give one credit for all the hard work I have done solely on my own. I was told by one of his own deputies that he is well known around courtroom 9 for giving ALL AUTHORITY to the county~!! He appointed me as my own attorney, but NEVER lets me speak. I believe God want's me to be the lighthouse in the courtroom where people just have jobs, tend to their own problems in life & continue to pass judgment on someone who has overcome so much adversity in my life~!!


I learned today in Luke 6 44-45 it's all about a unhealthy attitude & I refuse to lower my standards to the devils level. If you look in Romans 12-2 We can renew our minds & not let Satan drain us of our belief we are "special" & created for a great purpose. Then in Ephesians 3-17 "May Christ through faith (actually) dwell (settle down, abide, make his permanent home) in your hearts~!! May you be rooted deep in love founded securely on love" Also in Colossians 2-7 it also states about "keeping Jesus planted firmly in your soul."

I went in just as peaceful, relaxed and shared all I have done to regain custody or at the least move forward with more visits and a relationship the COUNTY stripped me & my children of~!!
So as of yesterday 6-11-12 I was served with a contempt of court for my blog~ where is my "freedom of speech" I was told by my previous attorney I could say ANYTHING concerning the way I did not like what the social workers, commissioner, baliff etc... was doing, guess not with them as they count what they want as wrong but they can violate the Ca. welfare codes of "Family getting the children first BEFORE entering foster care." and my parents house was checked out twice and approved as was my older daughter 28 and approved but the kids never went there because of there remarks "Your Linda's mother & you won't follow our rules." or my daughter was told "You have a close relationship with your mom, and she flies up often to see you." 

Then my lovely 15 yr. old has been so brainwashed by Angel Neilsen of San Paqual Academy (her social worker) some young women who just had a baby, like she's mother of the year ?? So my daughter runs back and tells them everything behind her own blood family & gets us in trouble, but she was told she could attend my daughter's wedding in Seattle in August but not the other 13 yr. old sister who is more impacted & disabled with autism but the 15 yr. old told my oldest daughter, "They trust me, if I came back I would tell them what went on." Well sorry my dear as my family don't pick "favorites" just because you have become "Imhoffs pet" doesn't work that way so YOU WILL NOT BE AT HER WEDDING OR AT THE GRANDPARENTS IF YOUR SISTER CANNOT ATTEND~!!!!!!!!!!!

I am beyond hurt anymore as my God controls it all. She has died her hair, that was once a beautiful auburn color and they allow her to do such things a child should not have the ability to go and do but they don't care for her she is there money ticket but I raised her right & she now has to become responsible for her life & where she is headed & put on about 20 pounds but the county told me I was feeding her poor eating habits, oh but they have done a great job~!!! It's called not absorbing protein & your body retains fat due to being on the "autism spectrum" she may look healthy but really is malnutrition.  Believe me I know as I had the test done and have the exact same condition as my girls so I am a bit smarter then those lost souls who are killing my children~!!
I feel for my girls as they were raised in a good home, going to church, learned all there manners, learned it's better to give then receive so they are ideal children for the welfare program to collect those mighty federal funds they collect off them~!!  If my kids swore, spit, kicked, broke things, ran away they send them back licitly split~!!
(IMHOFF believes my daughters grades are due to her ability & most are but if she had a drug addict or alcoholic for a mother, who spent more time with men then teaching her, reading to her, educating her & sending her to a private school in Washington where she had one on one help, she wouldn't be where she's at so come on Imhoff give credit again where it's due~!!)

I have NOTHING more to loose my girls were KIDNAPPED in 2009 & no matter what I have achieved even running my car into the ground now with bald tires, 35,000 miles, wear & tear on my engine going down to Scripps ranch to see Dr. Alan Lincoln @ CARES who don't care a darn about families either as I drove 73.5 miles weekly a year & a half and he and his assistant Dr. Kathryn Pedgrift who is now a psychologist as well both sat in that office last week & both agreed what was being done to me was WRONG but refuse to have the ..... to write a letter saying so. How can you really want to help autistic people if you can't stand up for what is right ?? It is very, very confusing to me, I guess cause I believe in rules, telling the truth etc....
So in Matthew 7-1-2  The bible talks about reaping & sowing : "DO NOT judge and criticize and condemn others, so that you may not be judged and criticized and condemned yourselves. For just as you judge and criticize and condemn others, you will be judged and criticized and condemned, and in accordance with the measure you (use to) deal out to others, it will be dealt out again to you."
I read in court to them all this bible verse Matthew Ch 7 V-12   "So then whatever you desire that others would do to and for you, even so do also to and for them for this is the law and the prophets."  ( This is the GOLDEN RULE to live by & teach your children which God knows I did.)
So now June 25th I am suppose to attend the hearing to be arrested for contempt for my blog and texting my 15 yr. old on Mothers Day she told them about but if they had seen that one text they would have seen the other one after talking to Lincoln about he urged me to apologize & I did explaining to her I was sorry my emotions got in the way I reacted but that was never notice nor was I given credit for it so again they see & hear what they want from a child . So maybe now with my service dog beside me and going to jail together, the media will want to shoot this story. My dog reduces my anxiety being a adult on the spectrum & they cannot deny me to have her as I will sue as I did Quizno's for not allowing me to be served because I couldn't bring her in and I put them out of business~!! This has gone way to far and if people cannot read and see this is nothing but DISCRIMINATION & picking on a disabled adult, bullying, intimidating, instilling fear in one, & using my children as pawns~!!!!!

I WILL NEVER EVER BE SILENT OF THE ABUSE, NEGLECT, MISCONDUCT, KIDNAPPING OF INNOCENT CHILDREN, MEDICALLY ABUSING CHILDREN WITH CELIAC DISEASE OFF THEIR MUCH NEEDED DIET~!!  My poor children are medically sick and had seizures, blood in her stool, vomited, muscle aches, headaches, skin issues (eczema) on and on as I had them on the wheat free diet 5 years. The youngest is legally blind and yet NEVER has on her glasses at visits & has had 4 eye surgeries already.

Outside the courtroom was a man who told "Berta Atkinson" my attorney who lost my girls to the state "I got custody of my boy (15) but he two day's ago was arrested on a DUI charge but had his kid.

COME GET ME AS I AM SO READY TO GO TO JAIL AS THE MEDIA HAS ALREADY BEEN CONTACTED & WANTS MY STORY TO BE AIRED~!!!!!!!!!!!

                                                            
 JESUS WAS PERSECUTED & ANY CHRISTIAN WILL BE WHO STANDS FOR WHAT IS  RIGHTEOUS & NOT WRONG IN THIS CORRUPT WORLD WE LIVE IN.

Another wasted court date despite ALL I have done~!!!

    For all that don't know this is commissioner Michael J. Imhoff who resides at the North county courthouse in Oceanside he is rather passive on my case & always gives authority to the county, ( wondering why he wears the robe ?)  I appeared before him again on Thursday May 10, 12 during my now 3 years & one month ordeal. I was told in January I was "intelligent & articulate enough to act as my own attorney." after losing custody of my children for a 3-day stay in the hospital for depression. I was kicked out after 3 days with no follow up plan but later called two weeks after and told were sorry. I was NEVER offered a reunification plan, (the norm) in fact it went into a permanent planned arrangement despite my parent's & older daughter (28) fighting for custody. They went through all their hoops of request from social services but never denied, nor were they ever given any legal papers stating why they could not have the kids other then being told "Your Linda's mother & we don't think you'll follow our rules, you don't believe what we believe." and my oldest daughter Amber was told "Your emotional like your mom (after being told the girls would not be in her April 2012 wedding which was cancelled) & "Your close to your mother, she flies up often to see you." 
Pertinent to the law under Ca. welfare & Institution code 361.3 (Relatives have the right to first gain custody of ones said child if there unable to care for them.) and pertinent to the law under Ca. welfare & Institution code # 16002 placement with an adult sibling or half sibling is allowed if they tried which my daughter Amber Souza did~!! but again was never denied nor sent any kind of legal letter saying why she could not have custody of her two sisters. In fact a inter-state transfer was going on for both girls to be sent to live in Washington State and those were stopped after my daughter became emotional with John (social worker) being told her sisters would not be in her wedding~!! Can you imagine her heartbreak ??
John Freistedt B.S. is my youngest social worker who has done nothing but play psychological games with her the child now 13 who is impacted by autism & mild c.p. keeping this child away from her mother over a false report for one year & four months. On occasion he has taken this child out for ice cream & who knows where else not very proper behavior for a county social worker huh. In the very first foster home my daughter suffered being bitten by an adult women on her arm, pushed into stairs for accidentally letting the dog out, came to visits with a smashed toe, smashed fingers had different stories for them all. She was being so abused she begged to go into a psy. hospital as she has always felt safe there knowing she could not be with her momma. Also John testified last year my daughter was packing daily & when asked why he responded "I guess she wants to see her mom." So I must mention what all this psychological, emotional & mental abuse these kids have been made to endure alienated from there momma & immediate family & suffering such NEGLECT BY THE STATE~!!

Angel Nielsen is my older daughter's social worker who resides out at San Pasqual Academy my middle child is now 15 and has been so brainwashed that I was told on Thursday she doesn't want "ANY" kind of relationship with me but we were planning and had asked for a birthday party on April 19th when my oldest Amber was out from Seattle and she text my daughter telling her "I am excited to see you both." the visit was never allowed~!! 
Imagine this women(Angel Nielsen) just had a baby of her own I will pray for that child~!! These social workers have allowed this daughter to suffer a sexual assault without calling the police & making a report. She was allowed to attend a unsupervised pool party of her teachers who was posting on her facebook page~!! She has been allowed unsupervised visits over night with school friends who's parent's don't undergo a background check but not allowed to go see her own mother who raised her or extended family she's been apart of all her life~!!  It was I who filed a police report but nothing was done as he stated she wouldn't talk & on my last visit with her over a year ago I tried talking to her about it and was told "Ms. Souza if you mention that we will end the visit." It's not shocking why this child with Aspergers herself has withdrawn~!!

So I will get to what happened on 5-10-12,  I have done more then anyone or anything would ever be required of one to regain their kids back & I DID IT ALL ON MY OWN~!!  

1. Went into a crisis house and lived for two weeks to better understand my disability (after the girls were taken I was diagnosed with major depression & aspergers very low functioning) which was grossly inaccurate I will elaborate later on.  

2. Took a parenting class for 6-weeks & turned in the certificate to court.

3. Took a weekend seminar class at USSD for parenting "special needs" children turned in certificate to the court (although my youngest was premature @ 4lbs. so I had much experience already in parenting, plus my oldest was 14 yrs. by then.)

4. Spent my last year & a half traveling 73.5 miles round trip weekly seeing a autism specialist at CARES (center for autism research, evaluation & service) 
Seeing Dr. Alan Lincoln Ph.D., MSCP, BCBA-D  who wrote a letter himself explaining I do have aspergers & depression but my issues with my emotions are apart of my very mild disability. In fact he did a I.Q. test and said I function at 99% of normal intelligence~!!!
Despite what was said, it went on deaf ears just as Lincoln predicted~!!

5. Then I spent another 5 months in doing cognitive behavior therapy with his assistant Dr. Kathryn Pedgrift Ph.d who recently acquired her own license.  

6. Gave a letter to the court on 5-10 from my family doctor who has been so impressed with me and my weight loss, blood levels she's taken me off meds and my mood change. Then Imhoff told me to go get on meds ?? That's their solution to everything MEDICATE~!!

So on Thursday acting as my own attorney I read from a paper I wrote about the law in children going to family first, then I explained after filing my state level appeal that was denied for discrimination and read over that all my court appointed attorneys (6) in total ALL AGREED I WAS BEING TREATED UNFAIRLY & STATED THE SOCIAL WORKERS HAD IT OUT FOR ME~!! This was told to me by their supervisor Kevin Lemuix of the DLG office. 
Then I had hired an attorney on my own Kari Marchant who has aspergers herself but was only a family law attorney so she couldn't help much but stated the county was playing keep away with the mother~!!  Attorney Berta Atkinson (McKinnon) lost my girls to the state and I was informed at court yesterday she had told another lady she is representing she lost her own kid to the state??  So after pleading my case with gross misrepresentation & misconduct on part of social services I wanted to drop jurisdiction of my case and give custody back to me. 
I was up against the children's attorney Jessica Smith (whom got married at the same time my daughter wanted to get married & wanted her sisters apart of her wedding but denied.) and county counsel attorney & the two above named social workers. Despite working very hard on myself losing a total of 73 pounds I was acknowledged of this and told what a great job but then to my absolute shock Imhoff said "Well keep the supervision, supervised calls & visits at once a month with my youngest and he encouraged SW Angel Nielsen so try & get my older daughter to at the least want to make phone calls to me (her mother). So it's as crooked as it has always been as I explained to Imhoff  "I don't have a alcohol or drug issues, I am who I was created to be by my Lord & Savior Jesus Christ~!!"  I have filed a e-mail with a company for celiacs who is going to investigate my daughter's medical neglect in taking her off her doctor prescribed diet of no wheat/gluten I did for 5 yrs. the wheat & gluten made her have seizures, blood in her stool, cramps & vomiting making her very ill and now they are over medicating her with psy. drugs to override the behaviors the wheat & gluten cause her. A hospital stomach doctor in Wa. put her on this diet who was very familiar with autistic children & the connection between autism & wheat this was so needed for her entire body. She is medically sick~!! All you with autistic children know how this damages the gut & brain of our precious children.  It's as corrupt & crooked as always not a thing changed~!! I am so sick of this world & all the evil that dwells in it but I pray each and every day for them all. When I am in eternity forever they will be enduring there hell but will never get out of it~!! ~ I pray mercy for you all.~

I AM ASKING ANYONE IF YOU HAVE A HEART & SOUL & WANT TO HELP ME AND MY CHILDREN OF THIS INJUSTICE OF OUR COURT SYSTEM, CHILD WELFARE. 
I AM A HUMAN BEING WHO DESERVES TO BE TREATED WITH DIGNITY AS DO MY PRECIOUS CHILDREN WHO LONG FOR THERE MOMMA. I BEG YOU TO HELP ME IN ANY WAY YOU MIGHT BE POSSIBLE TO DO. MEDIA, MONEY FOR A REALLY GOOD LAWYER OR CIVIL LAWYER~!! THANKS TO THOSE ON FACEBOOK WHO HAVE DILIGENTLY PRAYED FOR MY FAMILY. GOD BLESS YOU ALL~!!!!!  
MY GIRLS HAVE BEEN KIDNAPPED FOR GOVERNMENT FUNDS & AT LEAST MR. WILLIAM WINDSOR IS TRAVELING OUT TO SEE ME AND MANY OTHERS HE IS DOING A MOVIE CALLED "LAWLESS AMERICA" THE MOVIE AND I GIVE HIM PRAISE FOR STANDING UP FOR THE CORRUPTNESS IN OUR COURTHOUSES JUST AS IT IS ON OUR STREETS WITH OUR POLICEMEN JUST BECAUSE YOU WEAR THE BADGE, THE ROBE DOESN'T MEAN YOU DO YOUR JOB RIGHT~!!! 
E-MAIL ME AT SPOILEDBRATS3@HOTMAIL.COM    LINDA SOUZA                                                         

THREE YEARS THIS MONTH BUT DOESN'T AMOUNT TO MY ETERNITY WITH JESUS~!!

  This month marks the three year anniversary of my children taken into states care all because I wasn't lucky enough to have a partner & needed a break as I had suffered some depression. Raising 3 girls despite being married to both there father's at one time I was still "alone" in parenting them. It's cool as I had all girls and we had and will always have a bond that never will be broken despite what the enemy has stolen now 3 very long years. I have been transformed by the spirit into a wonderful piece of artwork the Lord my God has so masterfully created with his very own hands~!! 

 See Job 1:20  "The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord."  Then you hear in Job 2  9-10 "Then his wife said to him "Do you still hold fast your integrity ? Curse God and die! " But he said to her "You speak as one of the foolish women speaks. Shall we indeed accept good from God and not accept adversity ?" In all this Job did not sin with his lips. 

Oh how our precious Jesus has "his ways"  of getting our attention when and how he wants to, in order to prepare us for his awesome kingdom that is for eternity~!! In all the ugliness the devil means for our harm my father is still in control of that~!! I have missed so much with my two girls who are now teenagers but like Job if you stand firm in your faithfulness to God he will  restore you abundantly 10x over~!! (That's his promise to us) So I dwell no more on what the enemy has done but thank my wonderful heavenly creator for a closer, more loving, more understanding & committed relationship I have found in him. I have been praying for favor and God is being faithful in that as I am now finally after a year & 4 months of not seeing one of my precious girls due to a false report I am seeing her regularly even more then was first offered. Again if you focus on the goodness of God instead of what the enemy tries to steal from you, then your attention is exactly where God wants it to be and then he pours out his wonderful blessings to you. God wants us to love each other and share that love much with each other and then he will direct our paths for righteousness & blessings. I have never felt alone knowing my daddy takes care of all my needs~!! 
Our greatest gift we hold inside is our love so we need to use it to love one another as God first loved us by giving us his awesome son Jesus to die for us in order to save our souls from eternal damnation~!!  but it is written it is better to love those who you don't particularly care for as much because that shows God your true heart is to please him.  So I urge you no matter what trial or tribulation you have endured NOTHING is that terrible to forgive & forget to bring unity to our lives by love~!!  I am proud of who God created me to be and even with a disability of Aspergers I am who I am suppose to be because God makes NO MISTAKES in his creations~!!  I am a better person today ONLY because of his grace, goodness & love and his incredible spirit he has given me to walk in, to be his example in order to save more souls. I am a warrior for the almighty, powerful awesome loving God won't you join me ?

Don't ever allow what someone else thinks or says about you to be the factor that determines your value, because what God says is the only things that really matters.  (Joyce Meyer)

                APRIL IS AUTISM AWARENESS MONTH~!!

                                                                              
                                                                                                                                        

~WALK A MILE IN MY SHOES~

                  Life begins & it will surely end but we should not judge someone by their differences in what they look like, dress like, act like, or have more emotions than your use to~!!
I have come a long way from where I was and I would of never dreamed in finding out @ 46 yrs. of age I had Aspergers that it would cause such a cast of judgement on my ability to parent.
In life we cannot pick our family, our siblings, or even our extended family but you know your being analyzed when your children are taken from you at the most vulnerable time, when you need someone to go the extra mile for you and have a saving hand in a situation or crisis.
In my walk I have learned much and I have given up my fears for something better, my wonderful awesome savior Jesus Christ whom due to this once tragedy has brought me to my knees a dead stop in my walk, to listen and learn about what really matters in our lifetime.
I was such a awesome mom that I forgot about who Linda was but in all this I have rediscovered a wonderful creation I was meant to be and with it I have grown in patience, love, grace, peace and much character. If we just breathe and believe that is enough~!!
I have walked many miles in this almost 3 year journey but in it all God has had a perfect plan and through it I have also learned to see people through the eyes of love simply because autistic people have different perceptions of the way we see things and I used to see things or people in a negative manner with no patience but I have so changed and how I know this is my spirit has taught me to take a moment to pause the button and see them in a different way and you know what it feels great~!!
I am not going to sit here and talk bitterness about what I have been through because that does me no good but what I will say is how much I have accepted myself in a more positive way. I am by far a nobody just because I didn't graduate out of the Julliard school of music doesn't mean I am not musical.
I am very musical, in fact I hear the strum of a guitar in such a way I was able to write my own music and songs at one time. So because we choose to look @ people with judgement is our own fault because when you learn to put on your eyes of love it's a whole other picture. I always for years used to carry around a wallet size saying I acquired, it was the verse about if you live with condemnation you will learn to condemn, and if you live with fear you will become fearful and this was a reminder for me in the way I raised my own children but having Aspergers does tweak it in a way were not clear to see ourselves as others perceive us so it did affect my friendships as I was growing up and then I became a mother and consumed myself with that, which was good in some ways as my girls never missed out on nothing or ever longed for a qualified parent but the down side was I forgot about the MOST IMPORTANT PERSON myself~!!
This is why we must travel for so long in life to really figure out how to live. I have no guilt in what has now become my life, because I took care of the most important people in my life (at the time I thought was the right thing to do) and instilled morals, values, happiness, goodness and I believe still today despite our separation there is still a small flicker of light that flows within all our hearts for each other and God will take care of the rest. So as you start your day and get frustrated with your son, daughter, people or animals take a moment to hit the PAUSE button and take a few deep breaths and remember if you don't take care of yourself first, you will never truly be able for long term to take care of everybody else~!! Use your eyes of love to see what's in front of you before calling judgment. Remember were all in this together~!!
                                            
                                                    
                          Stay blessed in him & hug your children tightly~!!

                                                    

                                                    STILL GROWING                                                         

MY TRUST WILL BE AS DANIEL IN THE LYONS DEN (DANIEL CH 6 VERSE 16-24)

NOTHING will ever or can ever take the focus off my LORD as he is worthy to be praised even in the down times~!! TRUST was Daniel's greatest achievement as it will be mine~!! If we keep focused on Jesus and what he can and will do, he is a rewarded of those who search closely & follow tightly.
I am NOTHING without him, and I am so glad to give him praise as he controls ALL THINGS between heaven and earth. People can say things that are lies and have no value and as in the bible the Lord laughs as he can cast them down when he wants to. I am so happy to have found the peace, joy, happiness, stability I have found in all my savior freely gives~!! Do not let your heart be troubled he says and I will give you comfort and he surely does. Seeing people through the eyes of love as Jesus would see is a whole nether way to live. I feel no condemnation in my heart and live this way is so peaceful. I am eating healthier then I ever have, I am walking 4 miles a day and it will show and I am on a special regimen of vitamins & minerals that have done so much for my body. I sleep well and am the best I have ever been in my life @ 49 years of age. God is the master and if you let him he will make a masterpiece out of you. Despite any iniquities I may have Jesus shed his blood for me, to give me the life he wanted and knew I could have. So in all things big and small Jesus is at work behind the scene you just must hold tight to the trust in your heart in him and all will be well. I pray I can be a influence on someones life who wants to make a change they never thought possible in themselves but
                  with God all things are made possible~!!

                                       

MY HELPLESS AUTISTIC DAUGHTER IS BEING KEPT FROM HER MOMMY AGAINST HER WILL~!!

 My daughter who is my youngest daughter now age 13 is being kept from her mother illegally because she was legally KIDNAPPED from her mother from social services in San Diego, Ca.
 My daughter who has Autism, mild cerebral palsy & classified as mildly mentally disadvantaged.
It is heartbreaking for ANYONE who has a real heart & soul to watch this video I shot 2 yrs. ago when she first went in luckily she was moved to somewhat of a better home. In supervised phone calls she is so sad, misses her family something awful as you can hear it. I did absolutely NOTHING to deserve such a sentence, neither did my girls. I have a documented e-mail from a county attorney who supervises all the attorney's stating "All my attorney's have agreed you have not been treated fairly" & "It does seem the county has it in for you." Then another attorney I hired on my own who has Aspergers herself said in a report "This is the county playing  KEEP AWAY from the mother." and
"This is now a ADA issue, due to the mother's disability." Because I am very high functioning Aspergers only diagnosed AFTER my girls were kidnapped by the county. I want my story to go public as they have just told my adult 27 yr. old daughter who two sisters can't be in her wedding 4-14-12 that she told them over 7 months ago but when my oldest asked "what do you have against my mom she can't be here with her sisters ?"  His reply was "Nothing physical but she's emotional."
This is just a game of control & money the government gets from federal funding~!!!

**UPDATE** 1-10-12
In court this morning I was denied another attorney I asked for it would of been my 8th but I told the commissioner why, and his response was "As I told you once before Ms. Souza I think you articulate & intelligent enough to act as your own attorney, see back in June."  (BUT GET THIS)
Social services is saying " Linda is severvely mentally ill. " so if this was truth so I cannot parent but they want me to act as my own attorney. TALK ABOUT BLATANT DISCRIMINATION~!!
I got it all documented so now I have contacted the media~!!!! 





                                           http://youtu.be/9K_Lv26vbhk  

Learning through Gods beauty & grace how to take care of ME ~!!

Gods beauty is such a gift as I ponder and watch the sun hit the ocean you can almost hear a hissing sound as a reward for watching it set. These are my passion with my gift of photography I was blessed to be given by my awesome savior Jesus Christ. He gives freely to those who will accept his gift as I have found true unconditional love. I am on a journey and the ride has never meant as much as it does today because I was lucky enough to be given a second chance to lift my sail. I am thriving living & loving all this world has to offer. I am never broke with the amount of love in my heart I have daily from him who gives it. 
All I had to do was open my eyes to see beyond what I thought was my purpose in life but he has shown me I am important to and I deserve to be loved and cared about by him. 
My life was changed on April 17th 2009 after losing custody of my girls for a 3-day hospital stay as my story is well-known now but in losing my life that day I found it since truly and it has been the greatest gift my savior and I share. My girls are not gone forever, my girls have a very clear picture of who I was as a mom. I did my job, probably to much so I now know as everyone is entitled to "me time" but I gave that up when I got married, had kids and later found out two have autism and despite living with it myself my entire life it was only after the girls were taken I was diagnosed @ 46 but I raised one adult child already now 27 but the world judges you this is the change I plan to make. My life was there's but in all that has happened it's been a good thing because like Job, God may take something away temporarily to get your attention for his purpose & eventually get the glory but he multiplies it 10 x over when he returns it back. I am satisfied with the work he has done with me and I may not be exactly where he wants me to be but I surely ain't where I used to be. Praise Jesus for that~!! In all this God took a aspie woman and transformed me into a wonderful person that I can even say now I love and fully accept because it's not "US" that has the problem it's the word who does not like "different" and that's just the way it is but like Temple Grandin I am somebody, someone I never knew I could even be but by the good graces of God I have now learned to love myself and treat my body as his precious temple as it should be treated. He won't disappoint, he doesn't leave me, he always forgives me, he always loves me despite my faults unlike the world. I have learned a lot through the constant teaching of Joyce Meyer & Joel Osteen two very gifted people who have the ability to share Gods word. It was in one of Joyce's teachings of "Taking care of yourself" a podcast I watched on my Ipad it was then it hit me when she said "You will get to a point of breaking down physically,mentally & emotionally if you don't take care of yourself" (because you were so busy of caring for others) and that is exactly what happened I needed some "me time" and so I am doing just that. 
I am walking 3 miles a day, eating better, sleeping more and I feel a bunch better already. 
I am keeping a thought in my head and replay it over and over to keep me focused.


"God, I know that today nothing can happen that you and I can't handle together."

In Galations 5-22 it say's :
But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control against such things there is no law."


If we don't learn from his teachings then what good is it to even speak. I have learned so much from my heavenly father. I used to have a hard time with my mouth but self control has worked well when you really put it to use.
In Proverbs 17-22 he tells us "a joyful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit dries up the bones." Let him come live in you and your peace will be everlasting.

And always remember Romans 8-31
What then shall we say to these things ? If God is for us, who can be against us ?


Remember as well God has a perfect plan for each and everyone, you just must accept him.
Romans 8-28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good. For those who are called according to his purpose.

As my youngest says who loves Justin Bieber                                   
                 "NEVER SAY NEVER~!!"
Because with God all things are possible~!!!!!!!!!!!